Haven't put much use to this, but there will be huge gaps in time with each message because I need to think of something worth saying and be in a good mood.
Anyway
Throughout my teenage years I've tried to be aware of my self and mental state, I've noticed some things. Most of the time I will find my self not caring about my situation and where I am going in life at all, like I wouldn't care if something drastic happened and everything completely went sideways. This applies to a lot of aspects of my life, I'm extremely indecisive and never care about my future academically.
This sort of ties in to how I view life and death.
I don't really have a belief, whether it be that there is a god or that nothing matters and we are all gonna die anyway. It's sort of like, whatever happens was meant to happen and was going to happen no matter what, and there is nothing I can do to change it, even thought I can "change" my future, with the illusion of free will giving me a bit of hope. A bit like the "it is what it is" mentality.
I like to think I think logically when it comes to things like this, without bias, in fact most of the time I wished I was just a spectator.
I don't really see much in myself, even though I know anybody can be anything they want really, but I just don't care enough to be something.
I feel like I don't know my purpose, if I will have one, or if I'm supposed to have one, and frankly I don't care to have one.
By the way I am not one to take action, nothing will come of this inace you are concerned
That's all I can think to say
